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Joke of the Day

"My strong stance on drinking milk straight from the carton has met with no opposition from people who haven't caught me yet."

"There's a ghost in the house! CALL DR.BOO!"

"What is the difference between a Pickpocket and a Peeping Tom? A pickpocket snatches watches..."

"Why did the feminist fail algebra? She couldn't solve inequalities"

"What does an old lady's pussy taste like? Depends."

"You'll know it's true love when you're in your late 30s and have no other options."

"Q: Why are the citizens of Damascus so solemn when talking about oil? A: Because it's Syria's business. (cross-post from /r/funny by request)"

"""I enjoy working with a hammer, but I don't want a blue collar job."" - Everyone who eventually becomes a judge."

"Who is the most successful liar in the world? Mary. Lied about her extramarital affair, still believed by billions."

"How do you say ""Fuck You"" in Yiddish? Trust me!"