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Joke of the Day

"A tourist walked into a fish and chip shop in Ireland. ""I'll have fish and chips twice"" he orders. ""Sure I heard you the first time"" came the reply."

"Why did the computer squeak? Someone stepped on the mouse."

"A fun thing to do is go to the Facebook page of someone you've never met and ""like"" hundreds of photos of their baby."

"You're never too old to learn something stupid."

"Wife is painting the upstairs bedrooms. It's not in my nature to sit still while she slaves away so I went up and complained about the color"

"What does a pirate say when he turns 80? Aye matey!"

"How many white teenagers does it take to change a lightbulb ...none they would rather sit in the dark (im white teenage and mean no harm in this joke)"

"Why are there no Chuck Norris knock-knock jokes? Because Chuck only has to hit the door ONCE."

"Why doesn't the GOP establishment want Trump as their nominee? They hate colored people."

"Saw a couple standing in the park holding each other tightly, silently, not moving. I was touched. Both their phones must've been stolen."