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Joke of the Day

"Bathroom joke What's the difference between sanctuary and prison? Toilet paper."

"Why don't cats like online shopping? They prefer a cat-alogue."

"When apart, Sodium and Chlorine are harmful. When they form a bond, they are harmless to humans. Huh, isn't that ionic?"

"Which came first, the chicken or the egg? Neither. The rooster did."

"I put a picture of myself in a locket. You could say I'm... independent"

"If I wanted to seduce my mom with fruit... ...should I send her an Oedipal Arrangement?"

"He drove his car into a tree And found out how the Mercedes bends"

"""I Knew You Were Trouble When You Walked In"" is my favorite Taylor Swift song about a racist shop owner."

"Remember when waking up early on Saturday mornings involved cartoons and not untagging photos on Facebook?"

"I hate when I miss the garbage truck and just have to throw trash in the neighbors hot tub again"