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Joke of the Day

"What did the bad soccer announcer get for Christmas? COOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAALLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

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"What's long, hard, goes in a vagina, out of a vagina, and leaves a whore feeling good about herself? An abortion hook."
"Can humans justify anything? Obviously not, just look at Adam Sandler's career."
"Tell women at the bar you are the lead singer of Train. There's no way they can know your lying."
"Thanks for the glitter covered greeting card. I'll never forget this gesture because EVERY SURFACE IN MY HOUSE IS COVERED IN GLITTER NOW"
"What do you call a redditor in a wheelchair? Virgin Mobile"
"I cant believe I got fired from the calendar factory I mean, I only took a day off"
"What do you call a task that isn't quite mundane? Tuesdane"
"[dude is just absolutely drowning in the ocean, lifeguard sits back and smiles] i love no save november"
"Don't kiss me, I don't have the insulin for that. Tell me your diabetic jokes."
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