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Joke of the Day
"Uzbekistan Travel Advice In Samarkand some are kind and some are cunts."
Next Joke
"What does Tumblr and KFC's chicken have in common? They both contain high amounts of trans fats. Edit: Omg guys! I didn't expect this to take off this much, thanks guys!"
"Sing like no one is listening. Dance like you need to be shot with a tranquilizer dart."
"Kanye on the beach, by the water, holding two large conch shells up to either ear. ""That's incredible"", he says ""When did I record this?"""
"How do you write ""DO NOT TOUCH"" in braille ?"
"Bookstores are a great place to meet women... ... But not so if your opening line is ""What does this word mean?"""
"Give a man a plane ticket... Give a man a plane ticket and he'll fly for a day. Push a man from a plane and he'll fly for the rest of his life. First post sorry if its a repost"
"After I drink coffee I show my empty mug to the IT guy and tell him I've successfully installed Java. He hates me."
"It's not 'stealing tweets' if you believe in recycling."
"What's the difference between Santa and a jew? Santa goes down the chimney, the Jews go up."