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Joke of the Day
"What time does Sean Connery get to Wimbledon Tennish"
Next Joke
"You know how I just broke this huge cookie in half and put the other half away like I wasn't going to eat it? That was funny."
"I'm not sure why my dog enjoys watching me have sex but I'm sure deep down she's thinking ""B itch stole my move..."""
"I Can't Believe I Don't Get More Recognition For Being Really Modest"
"Ted Cruz is going to be in a movie Dummy Does Dallas"
"What's the difference between a clever midget and an STD? Well, one of them is a cunning runt... side note: apparently Jim Morrison of The Doors said this gem at a meeting with some record executives."
"I just seen a prius try his time on a quarter mile at the drag strip. Ill update when hes done."
"Miley Cyrus has her tongue out more than Jabba the Hutt."
"They called their son Honest Abe, because he was honest. They called their daughter Bloody Mary..."
"""Yes, I remember you saying"" - Translation: Please stop saying that"