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Joke of the Day

"[ice cream parlor] WIFE: I'll have two scoops of vanilla ME: me too, u could say I want an WIFE AND CLERK: please don't ME: ice cream clone"

"Why are there no joke about Jonestown? The punchlines are too long."

"They call me Moses. Cause I parted that Red Sea last night."

"The zoo is a pretty safe place to fart."

"Who did the Indian Girl choose to Marry? No one. Her parents chose for her."

"Why did the scarecrow get a promotion? He was out-standing in his field."

"Two whales are sitting at a bar. One of them suddenly says: ""Mmmwaaaaaaaooooomm!"" The second whale looks over and and says: ""Dude, you're really drunk."""

"Why does a cucumber has a lot of seed? He has no hands."

"20 years ago we had Johnny Cash, Bob Hope, and Steve Jobs. Now we have no cash, no hope, and no jobs."

"Did y'all hear the one about the tortilla song? Don't have source, but now that I think about it, it may have been a rap"