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Joke of the Day

"Why are they called jokes? Because calling them republican presidential candidates would make me cry."

"Where do you see yourself in 10 years? In a mirror! Reply from my 9 year old brother, after my mom asked me this while talking about future career prospects."

"Mirrors don't lie. Lucky for you, they can't laugh either."

"How to Feel Comfortable in Your Own Skin Step 1: Stop wearing other people's skin"

"Why are there fences around a graveyard? Because people are dying to get in!"

"The Boy in the Striped Pajamas is the only movie I've ever cried to... I laughed so hard I cried"

"I hope you're not one of those pupils who spends all day on the Net and doesn't get any exercise. Oh no miss I often sit around watching TV and not getting exercise either."

"Anyone who's voice doesn't jump a few octaves when talking to a puppy probably kills people for a living"

"""You're going to leave me for someone younger,"" my wife explained. ""That's not right,"" I assured her. ""They could be older too."""

"My computer just said 'hello' to me. I think it might be a Dell."