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Joke of the Day

"I hope none of these haystacks are sharing needles."

"Russian proverb: the church is near, but the road is icy... The pub is far away, but I'll walk carefully."

"I just saw a guy with such a big dick he could fuck himself... And all I could think was how he was so full of himself."

"What should be done in case of apparent drowning? Take the parent out of the water"

"I can't hear out of my ear... It's really EAR-itating"

"hey girl are u from tennessee cause u have a tennessee accent and i have ur birth certificate here and it says ur from tennessee"

"(Star Wars) If Finn and Rey hooked up and had a child The child would definitely be on the dark side"

"I've always wondered what lice do to you It's a real head scratcher"

"u think u had a bad day? smh think about the tree that just got cut down to make flyers for the next nickelback concert"

"My brother got into a car accident today I asked where he got into the accident at and how he was doing. He said he got into the accident in Oklahoma and that he is doing OK."