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Joke of the Day

"So a woman walks up to a tall guy and says ""hey, can you get me that box on the top shelf"""

"Old lady asked me to check her balance I was at an ATM and this old lady asked me to help check her balance, so I pushed her over"

"1 in 5 people are Chinese. Only 5 people in my family, it's either mom or dad, brother Colin, younger brother Ho Chan. I think it's Colin."

"Right now, a future teen mom is applying copious amounts of body glitter to herself."

"Who satisfies earth the most? Sun. Because the sun goes down every night."

"A pirate walks into a bar with a steering wheel around his waist... Bartender says ""Hey man, you have a steering wheel around your waist!? The Pirate replies ""Yeah I know... It's drivin me nuts!""."

"What does an Amish drive by shooting sound like? *clop clop clop, bang bang, clop clop clop*"

"Hey, baby, you wanna come back to my place, and become a famous murder victim?"

"I've changed my name to Yasiin Bey. It is very important to me personally and culturally that I am called by only this name from now on and I ask respect for my decision... said Mos Def"

"Me: I have a younger sister but she's nothing like me. Him: Wow, she sounds perfect."