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Joke of the Day

"My ex just called me, sobbing on the phone to tell me she has AIDS and I should get checked. The hardest part is acting surprised."

"*first date* Him: You have a very defined jawline. Me: Thanks! I chew a lot."

"What is a dog's favourite food ? Anything that is on your plate !"

"Why was the bodybuilder arrested at the elementary school? Because it was a gun-free zone"

"What do Bristol Palin and Iraq have in common? It's just so hard to pull out."

"I bet whenever a cow eats a lot of grass she says to her friends ""I've been eating like a cow!"" and they'd laugh and moo or whatever cows do"

"How do you tell the difference between a plumber and a chemist? Ask him/her to pronounce unionized Edit: Gets 3000+ upvotes, Karma remains at 20..."

"How does a gay male take off his condom? He farts."

"Why is peter pan always flying? He neverlands. I like this joke because it never grows old."

"Katie Price and Kerry Katona have both got books coming out this month...which could plunge the U.K. into a huge crayon shortage."