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Joke of the Day

"Apparently in yoga when the instructor says, 'next we go into our downward dog,' it is frowned upon to make the 'bowchickabowow' sound."

"Austim is a lie fabricated by the illuminati and used to promote John Cena"

"I get it, you have a philosophy degree, but I just want you to make my latte, not wax poetic about life, okay Baristotle? Extra foam please."

"Don't give your heart to someone unless you're 100% certain that you're dead."

"Pavlov hears a bell ring... He says, ""Aw! I forgot to feed the dogs again!"""

"What do you call a bear with no hair? Bare"

"Now that Christmas is over, don't forget to be thankful for all the children in China who made your kid's toys."

"What did Zach De La Rocha bring home from the beach? A pocket full of shells."

"Not to brag, but I still fit into the low self-esteem I wore in high school."

"What do you say to a virgin when she sneezes? Goes-in-tight!"