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Joke of the Day

"What's in an Irish 7 course meal? A 6 pack and a potato."

"How many handicapped guys does it take to change a light bulb? Just one if it's Professor X."

"A girl from the office is trying to get me fired for sexual harassment because I've been giving her ""inappropriate massages during work"" I said, Good luck sweetheart. I don't even work here."

"What do you call the Japanese police force? Kawaii Five-0"

"I organised a 3 some last night. There were a couple of no shows but I still had a good time."

"Why don't Pirates get invited to Birthday parties? Because they always steal doubloons"

"I lost my to-do list I don't know what to do"

"Found my cat reading To Kill A Mockingbird. I told him that it didn't actually involve killing birds, but he said he liked courtroom dramas."

"[at a child's birthday party] Lady: which one's yours? Me: uhh, that one L: that's my daughter M: *grabs the cake and runs*"

"What do you tell a lady with two black eyes? Nothing, You already told her twice."