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Joke of the Day

"A girl from the office is trying to get me fired for sexual harassment because I've been giving her ""inappropriate massages during work"" I said, Good luck sweetheart. I don't even work here."

Next Joke
 
"In the news today What do Aaron Hernandez and Edward Snowden have in common? They're both expatriots (expatriates)."
"The stock market has been looking thinner lately. It's lost several Pounds."
"I wish I was as committed to anything the way infomercial actors are committed to over dramatizing their reaction to household chores."
"Knock Knock Who's there ! Arizona ! Arizona who ? Arizona room for one of us in this town !"
"Just heard a little kid tell his dad he was a lion and his dad said ""Wow!"" What a fucking pair of idiots."
"How did the pepper end up getting killed? A salt with deadly weapon"
"Today I quit smoking cold turkey Turns out hot turkey is much better for smoking."
"Two corn muffins were in the oven baking. One turns to the other and says ""man it's HOT in here"" the other corn muffin replies... AAAAHAHHHAHAHAHHaaaaa A TALKING CORN MUFFIN!!!!!!!"
"I don't want to criticize but whoever named them brownies wasn't trying very hard."