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Joke of the Day

"What's long, hard, and has cum in it? Cucumber you nasty bastard"

"Two atoms walk into a party at the Large Hadron Collider... It was full of nerds so they split."

"What do you call a whore famous among pickles? A lady of dill repute."

"I'm bringing sexy backward."

"The local pedophile claims he got a perfect score on his SAT back in the day. Said it was as easy as giving candy to a baby."

"My iPod started crying after I dropped it. I said ""You'll be okay, stop syncing about it"". We laughed & made jokes about Microsoft together."

"The only way I want to see your ultrasound picture is if you're having a velociraptor."

"On a rainy day two men are standing under the poplar trees in the park One of them is weeping: - John. Do you know how difficult it is to lose a wife? - I know Jack, I know. Practically impossible."

"What happened when the cow jumped over the barbed wire fence? Utter destruction."

"What do priests have in common with my dad's BBQs? They both stick their meat in 10 year old buns."