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Joke of the Day
"How did Hitler tie his shoes? In little Nazis"
Next Joke
"Why were the people in the twin towers so upset? They ordered pepperoni and all they got was plane"
"I generally avoid confrontation, but I'll be damned if I'm going to let this serving size suggestion tell me how to live my life."
"Taking the lives away from 12 baby chicks. Bought an egg carton at the grocery store..."
"Obi-wan: *holding baby* Let's make her a famous princess Droid: What about the other baby? Obi-wan:*shrugs* Dump him in a desert somewhere"
"What did the maths homework website say to the geometry website? Boy do we have problems."
"Bf and I are on 2 completely different emotional planes right now. Work faster, whiskey."
"In the UK we celebrate Thanksgiving as the day we managed to ship all our paranoid religious fundamentalists off to another continent."
"What do a Harvard lawyer and a Yale lawyer have in common? They both got accepted to Yale."
"Gaining weight when you are still owing me money is a sign of disrespect"