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Joke of the Day

"If you hold a SUV up to your ear, you can almost hear the sound of the ocean screaming."

"Bruce Willis is at the supermarket, standing by the cucumbers & laughing hysterically, pointing at them with tears streaming down his face"

"Weed. Nature's way of saying high"

"What's the first step to making your favorite Jewish dish? Preheat the oven"

"What does Batman do on Father's Day? He oh..."

"What's the difference between fighting on the internet and participating in the paralympics? None, even if you win, you're still retarded."

"What does sex have in common with a savings account? You lose interest once you make a withdrawal."

"Why did Yogi Bear only have a collar and a tie, and not a full dress shirt? *Patiently waits as you all Google pics of Yogi Bear*"

"Caspar: I was the teacher's pet last year. Jaspar: Why was that? Caspar: She couldn't afford a dog."

"My favorite position is the 68. You go down on me and I'll owe you one!"