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Joke of the Day
"How do you get a philosophy major off of your porch? Pay for the pizza."
Next Joke
"ANAESTHETIST: Count backwards from 100 ME: 100..99..98 ME: ..3..2..1..um [looks round] now what? ANAESTHETIST [muffled] You have to find me"
"French girls are great... For example, my French girlfriend taught me how to eat out in the bush."
"""I just can't control myself around you"" - Me talking to a homemade batch of cookies"
"Cows What do you call a cow with 3 legs? Lean beef What do you call a cow with no legs? ground beef What do you call a cow with 2 legs? Donald Trump"
"Teacher: Johnny, use the words 'defeat"", ""deduct"" and ""detail"" in a sentence. Johnny: Yes ma'am. ""Defeat of deduct went over defense before detail."""
"Every function without you will always be void of love."
"Two guys walked into a bar.. You would think one of them would of ducked!"
"What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef!"
"The 3 rings of marriage The engagement ring, the wedding ring, and the suffering."