20596

Joke of the Day

"Apparently my 6yo old son went to school with a Spiderman costume under his clothes. The students of Edison Elementary are safe today."

"Why did the competitive deep-sea diver lose the big competition? He couldn't handle the pressure."

"Why did the eyeglasses model become a beekeeper? He heard that beauty was in the eyes of the bee holder."

"Me: Why do you love me? Wife: *shrugs* Me: Why do you find me annoying? Wife: *reveals six spreadsheets and a pie chart*"

"It is estimated that 1 Million people plan to gather at Times Square to watch the ball drop while looking down at their phones."

"why does a boxer have miscarriages.... ...because she punch backs whenever the baby kicks"

"I'm sorry I picked up dog poop using your selfie stick."

"I want to open a gay bar in Germany called Pole-Land. You know they'll invade the place."

"How do rabbis make money off of circumcisions? They get to keep the tips."

"It was 109 degrees where I live today. Now I know what it felt like to be a Jew during World War 2."