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Joke of the Day

"Did you hear about the new LSU Visa card coming out? You get Les Miles and zero points"

"[highschool reunion] CLASSMATE: I'm a top chef. You? ME: I'm an avoca C: a what M: an avoca C: what's an avoca do M: a top chef would know"

"what has three legs and a cunt a drum stool"

"A priest and a rabbi... A priest and a rabbi see a young boy. Priest: ""Let's fuck him."" Rabbi: ""Out of what?"""

"I think my neighbor is stalking me... as I saw her googling my name on her computer last night.I saw it through my telescope."

"What do you call a black pilot? A pilot, you fuckin racist."

"A woman, a murderer, a liar, a thief, and a cuckold walk into a bar The bartender asks: ""What will it be, Mrs. Clinton?"""

"What do Amy Schumer and a tampon have in common? They're both stuck up cunts."

"No one wants to be the sofa king But they all think they're sofa king funny."

"i started vaping to fit in with my friends, who are mostly steam whistles"