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Joke of the Day

"Question on my Visa Application ""have you ever been convicted of a crime ?"" followed by ""explain why""... so I put ""no"" and ""good lawyer."

"What's the difference between reddit and resturant ? Restaurants have better servers."

"It is almost 2012 and we still don't have printers that can successfully cancel jobs."

"Why do parents send their toddlers to the army for daycare? Because they're sending them to the infantry!"

"Are you from Iraq? Cause i wanna see you Baghdad ass up."

"Whats E.T short for? Because he's got little legs."

"What do you call a cow with only two legs? ...Lean Beef."

"If you love something set it free, if it stays its yours Go on then pizza, leave! Get outta here..... *pizza stays *happy tears"

"I remember one time when I was high... I asked a cat if it could talk. It replied Me? How?"

"If I was a plastic surgeon I'd probably spend my free time putting tiny breast implants in my toes."