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Joke of the Day

"HEY, mom of 3 unruly kids staring at her phone in the bookstore: ... Do you have a charger I can use?"

"Q: What did the girl sea say when the boy sea asked her for a date? A: Shore."

"I bought some pot from a T-Rex ... ... he was a small arms dealer."

"What's Franklin D Roosavelt's favorite game show? Deal or New Deal"

"How come squirrels get a pass to bury whatever they want in the park but the cops go crazy when I try to bury one tiny bloody knife?"

"A guy walks into a bar... and his alcoholism tears his family apart."

"According to Proactiv commercials, people with acne are incapable of being happy AND finding love. Tough break, mutants."

"My jokes are like cancer Only my dad gets it."

"What type of government rules the butterflies? A monarchy"

"The back-to-front comb over: Where mullets are laid to rest."