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Joke of the Day
"What did the house say to the other house when it fell on it. Get off me Homes."
Next Joke
"How are American beer and making love in a canoe the same? They're both fucking close to water."
"Me: Congrats! I heard you got married again Her: Sorry I didn't invite you. It was a small ceremony Me: Its ok. I'll go to your next one"
"What do you call a man who's always in high spirits? An alcoholic."
"Scientists Find Zika Might Be Transmitted by Oral Sex The study suggests a little head may result in a little head."
"I like my women how I like my chicken. Friend: Battered? Me:...no...hot and spicy...."
"How do footballers send messages? By referee-mail."
"ME:[defending myself] Oh yeah?? Well I got 5 words for you buddy: please be nice to me"
"Her: You're up to a pack a day nowyou have to cut back. Me: [petting the alpha male of the wolf pack I just adopted] I can quit anytime."
"The real reason women will never be the ones to propose... As soon as she gets on her knees, he will start unzipping his pants."