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Joke of the Day

"My mom once told me.... ....the only way I'll ever get laid is if I crawl up a chicken's ass and wait."

"We're pretty competitive My brother and I sometimes laugh on how competitive we can be, but I laugh more!"

"What did the neurotic pig say to the farmer? You take me for grunted."

"It's weird that America has never had a bald eagle president but Australia has had several kangaroo prime ministers (I assume)."

"How do you know if your girlfriend is ticklish? You give her a test-tickle."

"You Gotta Hand It to Leprechauns Because they Can't Reach It!"

"What do you call a soldier who survives mustard gas and pepper spray attacks? A seasoned veteran."

"French Joke Q. What do you call 100,000 Frenchmen with their hands up? A. The French Army."

"I guess hookers are getting into the holiday spirit. I seen one today advertising pumpkin spice pussy."

"I bet my girlfriend she couldnt tell me something that made me both happy and sad. So she told me that I had the biggest penis out of all my friends."