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Joke of the Day

"judas: i would never betray jesus he's the best jesus: my favorite movie is the Minions Movie judas: i am going to betray the son of God"

"Hey, people who leave the volume on an odd, non divisible by 5 number, how do you live with yourselves?!"

"I would suggest that Brazil build a bridge and get over it... but given their record...."

"These riots remind me of basketball There are always people stealing, but you can't win without shooting."

"Saw a standup duo last night. One totally died on stage. The other killed. Actually, now I think about it, it might have been a cage fight."

"Ever since I downloaded AdBlock on my computer... All the local girls in my area seem to have lost interest."

"Why didn't the chicken skeleton cross the road ? Because he didn't have enough guts"

"*wakes up the guy next to me* wow theres a sleepy boy here on this plane haha. Im on business myself. tryin to see if iceland is made of ice"

"So a developer walks into a var ..that's all I got"

"How do you know you're getting aid's From the pounding sensation in your ass."