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Joke of the Day
"Pigeons die when they have sex... Atleast the one I fucked did."
Next Joke
"To impress the guys I told them I was dating an artist. I didn't tell them her preferred medium was sandwiches."
"Why are Boy Scouts safest when travelling with a senior? They'll always have dry wood on hand to start a fire - this came to me in a dream... maybe it should have stayed there? *shrugs*"
"I'm not looking at your ass, I'm admiring your back pocket."
"Pretty woman, the kind that don't eat meat Pretty woman, the kind that likes to hug trees Ohoh what can I do? She's making me eat vegan food"
"They say the human imagination is infinite. Try to imagine a new color."
"On which day do monsters eat people? Chewsday."
"What do you get when you have sex with an STD infested mentally challenged person? The slow clap"
"As a doctor, I once had to remove the spine of a pirate He was all for it and said ""It was holding me back"""
"Game of Thrones would have had more seasons... But HBO didn't want it to dragon too long."