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Joke of the Day

"5 Second Fiction Thirty Two Yes she had once said ""Not if you were the last man on Earth"" but Barry was sure the actual Apocalypse had changed that."

"Can someone please explain this joke? Q. What do you call a bald teddy? A. Fred bear I don't get it."

"If global warming was causing guns to melt, we'd all be driving electric cars within two weeks."

"Why didn't the bird cross the road? It chickened out."

"Donald Trump was really bragging about how big his penis was last night. Obama doesn't believe him. He's now calling for the release of his Girth Certificate."

"I wanted to build my career on making chemistry jokes to cure my depression. Then I realized alcohol is a solution."

"You know what sucks about being an agnostic dyslexic insomniac? You end up staying awake all night wondering if there is a dog"

"What's the worst part about season 1 of Lost? The *pilot* episode."

"Imagine a place where you can buy everything related to the Sith and the Dark Side It would be called the Darth Mall... ...and everything would be half off"

"My middle finger gets a boner whenever I think of you."