64440

Joke of the Day

"My das always used to eat rabbit before he went for a run - he said it made him go faster Really, it just put a little more of a hop in his step"

"Coming out with a hair product line.... For philosophers, religious and introspective types... it's called ""The Human Conditioner""."

"Me: What does that cloud look like to you? 3-year-old: A cloud. Me: No, what do you imagine it could be? 3-year-old: Rain."

"I like watching horror films behind the sofa. That way my neighbours don't know I'm there."

"""Please note that WinRAR is not free software. After a 40 day trial period you must either buy a license or remove it from your computer."""

"What do you call it when you play Nintendo games because you have nothing better to do? Ennwii"

"Why did the ghosts haunt the bar? For the boos."

"Did you hear about the blonde who thought nitrates was cheaper than day rates?"

"My ex has made me dinner.. *gives a bit to the dog first*"

"A simple smile can brighten someone's day... ...but a wide-eyed, toothy lunatic smile can keep them up all night."