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Joke of the Day

"So a DBA walks into a NOSQL bar... but immediately leaves because he couldn't find a table"

"Facebook needs to add ""still banging my ex"" as a relationship status option"

"How was 9/11 an inside job? If the planes came from the outside."

"Math Teacher: ""If I have 5 bottles in one hand and 6 in the other hand, what do I have?"" Student: ""A drinking problem."""

"My ex talked me into marriage I mean, she was my girlfriend before she became my wife"

"Caesar tried to run when the senate came after him... but his leg muscles couldn't carry him fast enough. As he fell to the ground he cried out ""Et tu, glutes!"""

"""Blown out of all proportion"" ... .. is a cliche you don't see every day of the week."

"I support Greenpeace because I care about environmental activism, just not enough to do any of the real work myself."

"My wife says I'm way too condescending (That means I speak down to people)"

"Burning Man Build a man a fire, and you keep him warm for a day. Set a man on fire, and you keep him warm for the rest of his life."