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Joke of the Day
"What do you call it when someone accidentally gives you a handjob? A stroke of luck."
Next Joke
"Whats the difference between a garbanzo bean and a chickpea? I wouldn't let a garbanzo bean on my face"
"""Let's see what you're made of!"" he says on approach, knife in hand. ""Good."" I mutter. ""Another adversary who paid no attention in Biology."""
"Where do Easter bunnies dance? At the basketball."
"What does Polynomial Man say when you beat him? Youve foiled my plans again!"
"Why didn't the girl go into the haunted house? She didn't have the balls."
"SPOILER ALERT: In the book ""What to Expect When You're Expecting,"" it's a baby. You're expecting a baby."
"Vagina Steak (nswf) Today my husband asked me if my vagina was ""medium well"" yet? Pink but not bloody."
"I've been sneaking clay, sand and mortar into my housemate's food... When they find out they'll shit bricks."
"For Valentine's Day, I bought a bottle of champagne and a box of chocolates... ...and passed out alone on the couch, same as every night."