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Joke of the Day

"The reason Rhianna stopped working with Chris Brown was because he had awful rhythm... He put too many beats in a measure"

"[GRAND CANYON] WIFE: Isn't this incredible? ME: It's ok. WIFE: Were you expecting a thousand canyons? ME: I don't want to talk about it"

"The thing I love about baseball is that it has all the excitement of football, packed into 162 4 hour games."

"My last days. If I ever end up on life support unplug me. Then plug me back in again and see if that works. REBOOT me baby!"

"""Sorry, her father is a pterodactyl"" - me with the screeching baby in the grocery store."

"Need the best Hillary I need the best Hillary Clinton joke there is. The worst the better. I need to tell my history teacher. Shes a Hillary supporter. Dirtier the better"

"Men are like government bonds. They take so long to mature."

"What's a pirate's favorite move in chess? Check, matey."

"Why did Bill Gates name his company ""MicroSoft"" It is believed ""MicroSoft"" is a brief description of his penis ;-)"

"What's the difference between a lonely person getting trolled and a wanted sexual offender? Ones a pranked Redditor, the other is a ranked predator."