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Joke of the Day
"If my body ran half as much as my mind did, I would never have to skip dessert"
Next Joke
"Facebook asks what I'm thinking. Twitter asks what I'm doing. Google asks where I am. The internet has turned into my girlfriend."
"My wife gave me a brochure on anger management the other day. I lost it."
"I plan to retire at 30. The used tire business is just calling my name."
"Difference between a dead squirrel and a dead drummer in the road? http://imgur.com/PKibj The squirrel might have been on his way to a gig."
"Question Does having salt and pepper peubs make my dick look more distinguished?"
"What do you call the people that always are around musicians? bass players."
"Down with the metric system No more foreign rulers!"
"What did Paul Revere say when he got on his horse? Giddy up horsey !"
"I've satisfied every waitress I've met... With just the tip"