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Joke of the Day

"I like my coffee like I like my slaves. Free, you racist."

"Did you hear about the man with a cold who went to a miniature petting zoo? He was feeling a little hoarse."

"Fey items are full of irony."

"You said you wanted a video of me eating a banana. Nothing about me not slicing it. YOU'RE WELCOME."

"What do you call a white girl that can run faster than her brothers? A redneck virgin"

"I am so hot my mother calls me sun."

"Me: Dropped my phone & now screen doesn't work. Help forum: Should've had a better case. Apparently, my mother works in Samsung support now."

"My client's (soon to be ex) wife just flipped me off in the courthouse parking lot, so yeah, I'm obviously doing my job right."

"I'd like to think inside your box."

"What do you get when you combine a mountain climber with a mosquito? Nothing! You can't cross scalars and vectors."