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Joke of the Day

"I always click the unfollow button with my middle finger ."

"TIFU I'm like a 4/10 and she was a total 9."

"Why did hitler killed himself? He got the bill for gas"

"I needed a password 8 characters long .. .. so I used Snow White and the Seven Dwarves"

"Why do Jewish guys get circumcised? Because Jewish women love anything 10 percent off."

"I asked my friend if he wanted a drink and he said to surprise him so I brought back a side salad."

"I don't like country music, but I don't mean to denigrate those who do. And for the people who like country music, denigrate means 'put down'."

"How many feminists does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None. They can't change anything."

"I'm moving up in my job as a bike mechanic I've been promoted to spokesperson"

"[during lull in conversation] maybe people who say the earth is flat are thinking of maps"