202486

Joke of the Day

"On cold mornings, it'd be helpful if a menacing man screamed obscenities at me in German so I'd get out of the shower."

"The U.S. presidency is like my ex. Anyone can get in."

"What do you call cheese that isn't yours...? Not *your* cheese!"

"*crumples a hamburger next to the phone* sorry, i'm having trouble hearing u over this delicious hamburger noise call u later ok"

"Jewish Pun What did Hitler say when the Jews got away? Aushwitz, they got away!"

"I want to be a brick layer, I'm shittin bricks left and right.haha"

"Birthdays were invented by big wax corporations to sell more candles with numbers on them."

"Tony the Tiger knows that Chuck Norris is G-R-E-A-T!"

"Longest Joke ever Loading..."

"This election cycle makes me want to find a bar really badly... Do any 21st amendment people know where I can get a drink around here?"