202106
Joke of the Day
"If you really want to stick it to somebody... Use tape."
Next Joke
"My body is a temple But only because it hates Palestine. *Anthony Jeselnik*"
"Why is it called ""Alien vs Predator""? Isn't predator an alien too? They should've just called it ""Some Aliens"""
"I've been pro-immigration but if one more Mexican restaurant tries to charge me for chips and salsa, the deal's fucking off. Comprende?"
"Don't dress like a hoe and expect a guy to approach you like a princess."
"What's the difference between an epileptic corn shucker and a hooker with diarrhea? The epileptic corn shucker shucks between fits."
"I guess since you can't adopt Russian children anymore, you will just have to wait until they are old enough to be a mail order bride."
"ME: who's a good boy *kissy noises* DOG: I just murdered the cat ME: you are, yes you are *rubs dog's head* DOG: you're next buddy"
"Why should you never invite a boxer to a party? He always throws the punch."
"[whispers to you at my own funeral] ok don't freak out"