201990

Joke of the Day

"Expendables 4 (Rated R): Tom, Sylvester & Wiley Coyote coldly hunt down & eat Jerry, Tweety & Roadrunner. Directed by Quentin Tarantino."

"If the Pilgrims were alive today, what would they be most famous for? Their age."

"A boy walks into a butchers and asks for a pound of kidelies Do you mean kidneys? asks the butcher. boy: I said that didelie?"

"My 9yo son just gave me a hug and told me thank you for not naming him Dick."

"Where does a thumb meet its type? At ***the space bar!*** oh-my-goodness! ~Skip"

"My doctor told me I needed to break a sweat once a day so I told him I'd start lying to my wife."

"So a grasshopper walks into a bar... The bartender says, ""Hey we have a drink named after you!"" The grasshopper replies, ""You have a drink named Steve?"" favorite corny joke"

"I was out of tanning oil once, so I used PAM Cooking Spray. The tan didn't stick."

"If a tree falls in the forest does it make a sound? No. The universe uses lossy compression."

"What to you call a cow with no legs... Ground beef"