201822

Joke of the Day

"Why do dwarves laugh when they run? The grass tickles their balls."

"Its a wonder how stadiums get so hot When they're filled with fans!"

"[First Date] Him: Great dress. Me: Oh, this? *flips hair* *twirls* *skirt flares* *foot catches* *face plants* Him: Me: Hey! Come back!"

"UK: Hey u ok USA: What UK: I saw what happened USA: Im fine, nothing happened Canada: Hey I know what I said before but you can't stay over"

"Life is like a box of chocolate... You never know what you are going to get, but you can be sure that 99% of it will be crap."

"Why don't anarchists accept the metric system? They refuse to have liters."

"The Welsh were among the first to use sheep intestines as condoms.... The English perfected them by removing them from the sheep before using."

"Dragons have tattoos of Asian chicks on their backs."

"Confidence? Oh yeah I've heard of that. It comes in a bottle and you have to be 21 to buy it."

"I found the secret to getting fresh content on the front page. I turned my laptop off and opened Reddit on my phone. Boom, all blue links on my front page again."