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Joke of the Day

"Where are the baby leeks? In it's nappy! (diaper for my american friends) (I work in a supermarket, this is how I pass the time)"

"When Germany won the World Cup, I did nazi that coming."

"I'm going to name my son After Me. So every time he asks to do something cool I say ""ya After Me."""

"Most women desire someone who makes them laugh and also feel safe, so basically a clown ninja."

"I really wanted my kid to be a kid so I gave birth directly into the ball pit at Chuck E. Cheese's."

"When life gets tough, remember this: You were the strongest sperm."

"What did the 11 year old junior paleontologist and 50-cent music lover with cancer receive from the one wish foundation? A Rap Tour"

"Who was the greatest prostitute in history? Ms. Pac-man. For 25 cents she would swallow balls until she died."

"Management tip - only hire bald guys. They don't have anything going on besides work."

"*Opens a window and the wind blows 84 hamburger wrappers from my desk.* ""Oh no! My research!!"""