201752

Joke of the Day

"Two crows are loitering in the park; why did they get arrested? Attempted murder."

"How do you make someone holy? You beat the hell out of them."

"I love buying cardboard boxes online. You always get one more than you pay for."

"""I never weigh myself"" -People who weigh themselves daily"

"A prostitute said she would do anything for 10 dollars. Look who just got his car washed. THIS GUY!"

"For the first time I am going to be visiting Britain this summer, but when I got there... Britain had already left."

"How do crazy people get through a forest? They take the psycho-path!"

"Obama and Putin are fighting over a phone charger. You might even say they're in a power struggle."

"I thought I really understood what I was thinking, and then I spoke."

"What do you get if you divide the circumference of a pumpkin by its diameter? pumpkin pi"