201743

Joke of the Day

"I only ever learned a couple karate moves, so you could say I know partial arts."

"How many South Americans does it take to change a light bulb? A Brazilian!"

"Age gets better with wine"

"Why didn't the toilet paper cross the road? It got stuck in a crack."

"[restaurant] *patpatpat* ME: you hear that? *patpatPATPAT* DATE: what the [penguin bolts out of kitchen with a fish] CHEF: SOMEBODY STOP HIM"

"Why did the baker have brown hands? Because he kneaded a poo. Better if you say this aloud."

"What's an idealist vegetarian's favorite meal? Peas and hominy"

"Why did the boy close his eyes before opening the refrigerator? He didn't want to see the salad dressing."

"What do they call soda in Rome? Pope."

"[scrabble] BATMAN: pass SUPERMAN: again? BATMAN: can't spell anything SUPERMAN: *rubbing temples* not every word has to start with BAT"