201714

Joke of the Day

"Why is Joey Tribbiani a presenter on Top Gear? It makes no sense, he's not a good driver, he and all his friends are always stuck in second gear"

"What do you call a Frenchman in sandals? Philippe Philoppe."

"If nothing else, the iOS7 update has proved it's usefulness by automatically adding the little accent mark to the word jalapeno for me."

"Me: Close your eyes. Give me your hand, darling. Can you feel my heart beating? Do you unders... Dr:(removes stethoscope) Really? Everytime?"

"Dark humor is like food Not everyone gets it."

"Two peanuts were walking down the street One was a salted."

"A woman came in for a job interview wearing an abacus on her head. I hired her right on the spot. It's so hard to find employees who you can count on."

"A man bets his wife that she can't make him happy and mad at the same time She says, ""Your dick is bigger than all your friends' dicks!"""

"What does a taxidermist do for a living? Oh you know... stuff..."

"CIA DIRECTOR: if u take this deep undercover assignment, u will have to give up ur own name forever STUART GIGGLEDICK: not an issue, sir"