200507

Joke of the Day

"Overheard, my parents, watching the World Cup: Dad: Who are you routing for? Mom: I'm routing for it to be over."

"Wife Missing My wife has been missing for a week. The police called me and said to prepare for the worst. So I went back to Goodwill and bought all her clothes back."

"Don't die a virgin. Seriously, there are terrorists waiting for you."

"There are 364 days until Christmas and people already have their Christmas lights up. Unbelievable...."

"Why did the stoplight turn red? Well, you would too, if you had to change in front of that many people!"

"A police officer just knocked on my door... and told me my dogs were chasing people on bikes. Pfft, my dogs don't even own bikes, idiot."

"When carrying a sleeping child to bed in the dark, make sure all intervening doors are open. Babies make cranky, ineffective battering rams."

"Women are better than cake. You can have a woman and eat her too."

"What did ron say when he got Hermione pregnant? Fetus deletus"

"Wanna hear two short jokes and a long joke? Joke Joke Jooooooooke."