200367

Joke of the Day

"What idiot called it British conjoined twins and not chapstick?"

"why don't men do laundry? cause the washer and dryer don't run on remote control!"

"Why don't sea-gulls fly over bays? Because then they would be bay-gulls."

"Statistics humour The median and the mode walked into a bar. The bartender asks, ""Where's your other friend"". The median says, ""We don't like him anymore. He's mean."""

"I once had an epileptic fit during my turn at a game of charades. Everyone just kept yelling, ""HOW MANY WORDS?"" and ""IS IT THE EXORCIST?""."

"How do I know you're getting laid tonight I'm stronger than you"

"Did you hear about the janitor who lost his job at the sperm bank? [dirty] He was caught drinking on the job..."

"Why don't the Mexicans have an olympics team? Because anybody who can run jump or swim is in the States."

"no, dont go there dont touch that no, leave it alone keep your hands off! a typical morning with my 3yo (or pissed off with my husband)"

"You can tell which side of your pillow is the cool side because it's the one smoking a cigarette."