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Joke of the Day

"You'd think with all the hiking Dora the Explorer does, she'd be thinner."

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"What kind of injury results from having an omega-3 bottle thrown at your head? A super-fish-oil wound"
"Would you like some salt? Na."
"1. Tattoo ""I'M WATCHING YOU"" on your shaved head. 2. Grow hair and wait for daughter's boyfriend to come over. 3. Shave head in front of him"
"Holy shit. I just realized this sales kid is treating me this way because he thinks I'm old"
"I like my upvotes like I like my women. .. One at a time and not very often."
"BERNIE: all people deserve to be treated equally HILLARY: the oposite of ""bernie sanders"" is ""soakey waterers"" BERNIE: ... HILLARY: pls fav/rt"
"Why was the crocodile taking viagra? He was suffering from eREPTILE disfunction."
"Sometimes I wake up grumpy.. Other times I let her sleep"
"A man learned that every time he reposted a joke on Reddit, he gained a year to live. He was already immortal."