199918

Joke of the Day

"Stole a bunch of extra long q-tips from the doctor. Who wants to party?"

"Women can't seem to resist my charms. What? They're magically delicious."

"What do you call a Phillipino contortions? A manilla folder"

"[airport security] *Beep* ""step through again, but don't say Beep."" *Alarm* ""Once more sir, but if u speak, I'll shoot u."" {thinks} *bzzt*"

"""Male""-Sexual Don't worry, that doesn't mean I'm gay It just means, anything that comes in a mailbox... ...makes me want to cum in a mailbox."

"Nobody deserves to look that peaceful sleeping. SLAP."

"Am I the only one who's concerned about the fact that we haven't heard SHIT from Wyoming in like nine years?"

"What's the difference between toilet paper and a shower curtain? So you're the one!"

"My girlfriend just emailed me a photo of us on our first date together. It's a very treasured memory for me. Problem is, the file wont open on my computer. I guess I have emotional attachment issues."

"What do you call a wolf you cant find? A where wolf."