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Joke of the Day

"If you don't send the person you're stalking a nude photo of yourself, then you're not taking that relationship serious enough!"

"Made a hiking playlist called 'trail mix' It has a lot of eminem in it"

"""Cash or Debit?"" ""Did you just assume my tender?!"""

"How to sound Australian. Say ""good eye might"" aloud."

"""Donald is intensely loyal. To family, friends, employees, country."" -His 3rd wife"

"A gay man walked up behind me at the bar He asked to push in my stool"

"I may not be Dairy Queen, baby, but I'll treat you right!"

"If Abraham Lincoln was alive today... He'd be desperately clawing at the lid of his coffin."

"You know why I hate Cancer? I have crabs. *(Zodiac)*"

"Teacher: We're going to need you to work with your daughter on humility. Me: I was never good with weather stuff but I'll give it a shot."