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Joke of the Day
"Didn't manage to catch any fish today... It was a failure."
Next Joke
"Sometimes I like to stick a band aid on the middle of my forehead and when somebody asks what happened I tell them I got shot."
"How many American golf fans does it take to change a lightbulb? 1001 1 to offer up the bulb and 1000 to scream 'Get in the hole'"
"Boss: Are you done with those reports yet? Me: Can you stop hovering over me? Boss: Sorry [turns off jetpack] Me: Much better."
"Came downstairs to find my 85 year old mum watching the TV Me:"" Why are you watching Thatcher's funeral?"" Mum: ""Just to make sure"""
"Did you hear the news about the failed plan to send ISIS a shipment of deactivated bomb vests? People are surprised it's blowing up."
"How many hipsters does it take to screw in a lightbulb? It's a really obscure number and you've probably never heard of it."
"10 bucks says when Dora grows up, she's gonna be a drug mule."
"What do you called a piano someone pissed in? A peeano."
"I've recently started eating steel It's a refined taste"