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Joke of the Day

"You can't change a person unless they wear adult diapers"

"You are dark and handsome; When it's dark,you are handsome."

"If you use a meat tenderizer to repeatedly hit a backless bar chair does it become a stool softener? Probably."

"Between men and women... There's a vas deferens."

"How do you tell the difference between a chemist and a plumber? Ask them to pronounce ""unionized""."

"How do you make a hormone? ... Don't pay her."

"I'm making a band! I started a band called 999 Megabytes...we havent gotten a gig yet."

"What is heavy forward but not backward? **ton**"

"I was never a photogenic person, because when everyone said cheese I said ""WHERE ?"""

"Why did the hippie drown in the ocean? He was too far out."