19890

Joke of the Day

"20 years ago we had Johnny Cash, Bob Hope and Steve Jobs. Now we have no Cash, no Hope and no Jobs. Please don't let Kevin Bacon die."

"I took the shell off my racing snail to speed it up. If anything it made it more sluggish."

"Doctor: I have two pieces of bad news for you. One is that you have cancer and is going to die soon. The other is that you have Alzheimers. Patient: Oh. But at least I don't have cancer."

"In London Homosexuals pay gigolos in pounds and get the change in pennies."

"Incidentally, the WORST trick the Devil ever pulled was trying to convince the world he wasn't fat by wearing a t-shirt in the pool."

"Harold & Kumar Go to White Castle (2004, R): Harold and Kumar go to White Castle"

"A drunk stumbles out of the bar, sees a nun on the sidewalk and pops her one right in the nose... while she's on the ground crying, he says,""Not so tough now, are you, Batman?"""

"Do you know the major difference between Hitler and Michael Phelps? Michael Phelps can actually finish a race."

"Why did the cowboy buy a Dachshund To get a long little doggy"

"""I'M NEVER DRINKING AGAIN!"" Brain: LOL Empty bottles: LOL Wine shop owner: LOL New bottle: LOL Bottle opener: LOL Liver: LOL Me: LOL"